Why 2007 should be the "Year of the Toilet". The Chinese New Year has a goat, pig, dog, cat, and many others so why not have "A year of the Toilet"?
Here are a few reason why we need "The year of the Toilet."
Royalty:
The Toilet Seat has been called "A Thrown". Paint it gold and you will have a golden thrown.
Education:
There is no better place to sit and read, look at pictures and do something else,
while on the Toilet Seat.
Power:
Yes that's right I said Power. It's all in the flush, and if your Toilet is your thrown then you have a royal flush. If you don't want to go that far, you can always yell as you flush "Bombs Away".
Comedy:
We all like a few Butt jokes from time to time. Awh, crap I can see this going to the pooper already
Arguments:
Sorry guys we loose this one. A women will always claim " Your so lazy- You never put the seat down"!
Always remember women will recall this, not just from today or yesterday. They can and will bring it up from last week, last month, and even Years later. Yet to find out how far back they can go.
Radio:
The Toilet even makes a good discussion on the radio. Every Thursday one of our stations has what they call the "Ladies room". There topics change from week to week. The last one that I got to listen to was on Toilet Paper.
When properly replacing a roll of Toilet Paper, does it unroll over the top of the roll or does it unroll by going under the roll?
Relationships:
The Toilet is the cause of all break ups. Here's your proof.
Guy goes into the restroom, not more than 5 minutes later she will go in and check it. First thing they look at is the seat. Is it down or up? Does the roll of Toilet Paper unroll correctly? If the seat is down is it dry
. If the seat is up they will look at everything as an excuse to break up with you. It's just the beginning....and after the break up she will always claim "there was something I didn't like about him".
Then on the other hand, she could be out with her girlfriends and they talk about you. You are nothing but a cheat, your cheap, and you are afraid of commentment, then she will say, yeah but he puts the seat down....
Then they all agree you are a keeper.
Love:
There is nothing that tells a women you love her more than putting the seat down.
This is better than flower, chocolate, and even diamonds. Guys this is how you win the women over. After going put the seat down, or better yet just set down to go. Yes guys we can pee setting down.
Here's a tip. Pull down your pants, place hand between legs, push down on the little thing between your legs and pee. Stand up and you did it.
Don't forget to wash your hands. There is a little red light above the bathroom door that only women can see and when it flashes it means you didn't wash your hands.
Element of surprise:
Nothing surprises women more than the Toilet Seat being down and dry
The unrolling of the Toilet Paper is a bonus.
Women can surprise men here as well. Take the lid and wrap it in duck tape.
Duck tape is warmer than a cold Toilet Seat.
The man will think, This women has duck tape and know's how to use it, Or you just scared the crap out of him because he know thinks you are more of a man than he is.
I just gave you several reason why 2007 should be the "Year of the Toilet"
Let's skip that and get to the stink of the matter.
1. Put the lid down, don't be like the Christian stand up comedian Brad Stine
who says " Guys must tell the girls the rules - If the Toilet Seat is up put it down.
Guys this just leads to lost arguments later
2. When you go to the Bathroom today, and you sit down on your thrown, You will have time to think, as your Butt warms up the seat, you will wonder
First does the busman really put down the seat? But what was the true meaning of his post? Does he really want the "Year of the Toilet"?
Here's the meaning.....
Does the Toilet Paper unroll over the top of the roll or the bottom of the roll?
That is the question of my post. Please answer this question so I know the proper way of changing the roll of Toilet Paper
That way I can put the Toilet paper on the roll and get off the can and get something else done today.....
HERE ME FLUSH,
