Dear Abby, dear abby...
my feet are too long
my hairs falling out and my rights are all wrong
my friends they all tell me that I've no friends at all
won't you write me a letter, won't you give me a call
signed Bewildered
Bewildered, bewildered...
you have no complaint
you are what you are and you aint what you aint
so listen up buster, and listen up good
stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood
Dear Abby, dear abby....
my fountain pen leaks
my wife hollers at me and my kids are all freaks
every side I get up on is the wrong side of bed
if it weren't so expensive I'd wish I were dead
signed Unhappy
Unhappy, unhappy...
you have no complaint
you are what you are and you aint what you aint
so listen up buster, and listen up good
stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood
Dear Abby, dear abby.....
You won't believe this
but my stomach makes noises whenever I kiss
my girlfriend tells me it's all in my head
but my stomach tells me to write you instead
signed Noise-maker
Noise-maker, noise-maker
you have no complaint
you are what you are and you aint what you aint
so listen up buster, and listen up good
stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood
Dear Abby, dear abby
Well I never thought
that me and my girlfriend would ever get caught
we were sitting in the back seat just shooting the breeze
with her hair up in curlers and her pants to her knees
signed Just married
Just married, just married
you have no complaint
you are what you are and you aint what you aint
so listen up buster, and listen up good
stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood.
Song Dear Abby by: John Prine
After hearing this song I thought I would write my own letter to Abby
Dear Abby, dear abby
I just got screwed
I was told I was going to have a route
then they took it all away, now I sub everyday
the kids treat me like crap,
and they want me to play rap.
signed busman
Dear Busman, dear busman
you have no complaint
you are what you are and you aint what you aint
so listen up buster, and listen up good
Bend over next time it won't hurt so much